4 stages of love every couple goes through in a long-term relationship

We know that true love changes over time, even in healthy relationships. The communication styles and circumstances of each relationship are unique, but the stages of love remain predictable.

Unfortunately, too many couples give up early because they are afraid of changes in their love life.

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It’s easy to focus on the romance and fantasies we see in movies. On the other hand, a relationship that stands the test of time takes a lot of hard work. Understanding what to expect during the love stage and developing effective communication skills will give you the best chance of success when your relationship is tested.

Here are the four stages of love that every couple must go through to build a quality and fulfilling relationship:

1. Romance and falling in love

In the first stage, everything is perfect, especially your new love.

You’ve found someone you “click” with. This person makes you feel like the wait was worth it. You only see similarities between the two of you and want to be together forever.

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Unfortunately, this stage can be stressful. But that’s only because you have so many hormones working overtime and you’re constantly thinking about that person. You are literally obsessed with your new “relationship.”

Research tells us that dopamine is a hormone associated with the brain’s reward system that can actually give you the same high as cocaine. This hormone, along with other hormones like serotonin, testosterone, and estrogen, determines much of your behavior during this phase.

When the word… It’s important to maintain your own sense of self during communication during this romantic stage. It’s also important to remember that you may be projecting your hopes and dreams of future happiness onto this new person.

2. Marry

Most people find this stage more enjoyable than the first. It’s less stressful and there’s a real “couple” feeling.

You have overcome the awkwardness of these two “aerobic words” and your love has deepened. You will understand each other better and slowly discover some of your partner’s hidden shortcomings, but also accept them.

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This is a very meaningful phase that one naturally thinks, hopes, and expects to last forever.

But the reality is, your relationship has to go through another crucial love phase before “forever” becomes a reality.

3. Obvious disappointment and reconsideration

At this stage, everything starts to feel boring and disappointing. You may even start to wonder if you were crazy when you made the commitment to your partner.

“Did I make the wrong choice? Why didn’t I see this coming? Would I be happier with someone else?”

Behaviors and habits that were once sweet and endearing become boring and irritating. You feel unappreciated, unloved, uncared for… and stuck.

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This is the alienation stage, often called “Seven Year Dave.” Both of you care more about your own needs and desires than anyone else’s. Your autonomy begins to take precedence over the relationship, putting it in jeopardy.

Of all the stages of love, this one is the most critical in determining the future success of your relationship. Effective communication skills are key to navigating this stage.

4. True Love

During this stage, you and your partner see each other more clearly. You see the positives as well as the negatives, and the flaws don’t scare you.

At this stage of love, you and your partner truly feel like you’re a team. You’re less concerned with your own individual desires and needs and more concerned with your partner. And if you both feel this way, you’ve reached that long-awaited climax.