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Death is a slow, difficult process for most living things – whether humans, animals, birds or insects.
I have seen a bird die of old age and a cricket slowly die and be attacked by ants before it took its last breath. I have held my 18-year-old cat, Angel, in my arms until it died. I have seen humans train it to refuse food and die after a few days. I have seen my oldest brother take his last breath with a smile on his face. He knew he had lived a good and responsible life and that his brothers and sisters loved him.
I have several friends who are over 95 and wish to die. One of them keeps reminding me that only good people die young. I think that’s partly true. Another says she wants to die, too, but can’t. “Not yet!” she says. She’s fallen several times and broken her limbs and hip, but she refuses to see a doctor. As a doctor’s widow, she knows broken bones can’t be healed. As for the blood on her face, she treats it herself with disinfectants like Dettol.
My friend, who is a little younger than me, wants to die. He only eats bread once a day and is now skin and bones. I told him that this is not a way to die, but he disagrees. I said that sooner or later the hospital bills will kill him and that the death will be slow and painful, with needles sticking into his limbs. He didn’t listen.
I have another friend who has been suffering from cancer for many years. He had a narrow escape once and he said that was enough. He had made all preparations and flew to Switzerland to die because he could not afford the medical expenses. He was the second friend to choose euthanasia.
Life is what we make it. I told my starving friend that most of the pioneer generation had lived long enough and were ready to leave. The question was how we left.
My neighbor jokingly asked me what I would do if I died alone in my apartment and no one would know. As another old neighbor had advised me long ago, I responded, “Who cares! It’s not my problem anymore!” Yes, I told my neighbors to call the police if there was a bad odor!
Old age is the last part of our life journey, which most of us have to face alone. No matter how active we were when we were young, no matter what we achieved or failed, we have to leave this world. Unlike what the government thinks, everyone wants to be independent. We don’t want handouts. We want dignity. The government should give up the ideology that we just want free stuff, free medical care, free this and that. We just want to die with dignity.
Zhang Sulan
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