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Last draw, third draw, last chance. For me, the voice in my head was, “We, you, I have to go!” Realize that nothing will change. They will never change. Accept that it’s not your problem but theirs, or at least you’ll try to comfort yourself.
As a science fiction fan, let me tell you about my two Get Out moments. Withholding names to avoid libel charges, my two loves are *X-267 and *X-78.
Growing up, my mother was very strict with me. She barely allowed me to leave the house, and when I did, it was a 6pm curfew. So, this caused me to rebel. She thought, “I am glad to apologize for your permission.“Anyway, we’ve gotten past that stage and my mum and I are more or less best friends.
Now imagine going on a date with someone you wish you had asked for their permission to go out with. Wanting to know all the details. With whom? Where? When? Arrival and departure times? Crazy! I have the courage to say this now. This is what it’s like to date an *X-267. Back to my mother’s rules. More like dating my “mother”.
Everything else is fine. Dating, intimacy. But being with a guy who monitors my every move and texts me in the middle of the night, insisting that I don’t “respect” him just because I choose to hang out with friends when he’s not around is just horrible. Control freak, get out now!
If someone had told me earlier that anyone who cheats on their partner with you and then starts dating you again will do the same to you, I would have stood my ground and said, but not like this *X-78. Just let me laugh.
At first, we got along really well. He used to call me first thing in the morning just to hear my voice, check on me during the day, and of course hear about my day at night. He would also randomly stop by to see me because he missed me and didn’t want to leave empty-handed. I was very excited to say the least.
However, you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. I didn’t even have to dig through a lot of evidence to figure out he was cheating. A woman’s intuition never lies. Conversely, mine never fails. He did exactly the same thing he did with his ex: copy and paste.
My “escape” moment is when it starts to get a little violent. But here I am, having slapped X-78 hard. I can’t recognize myself or what I have become. Toxic. The poison has spread to my loved ones, school work, and social life.
Honestly, it took me a long time to leave. But once you do, it’s such a relief. Like a lost sheep that leaves the flock only to find that you have a lot of wool that needs to be sheared.
Sheep don’t shed their skin naturally. The long-awaited moment of shearing is the moment when I shed my wool.
*The author is intentionally anonymous
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